Thursday, August 25, 2011

little guy gripe: " the sipper"

Background: I have 4 boys. this means that my house is always loud, messy, dirty, and shit is always broken. it also means that I am the QUEEN and don't have to compete with any other female for any of the attention. this is a blessing and a curse because it also means that I always have at least one child attached to me every single second I am home unless its "daddy's time" in which case I have one BIG kid hanging all over me. However, I wouldn't trade a single one of them for a girl. ever. there's only room for one bitch in this house.

Now, on to the gripe.
The little guy. we call him Scootsy. Scootsy is ALMOST 2. If you know me you know that I'm not a total hippy, but I am a little "granola", So Scootsy ( like all my other kids) has been breastfed since birth. This is part ideology, part health, part laziness ( I'm not getting out of bed to make a bottle for ANYONE), and part cheapness ( go buy a can of formula and you'll see what I mean). My Goal has always been to make it to 2 years of breastfeeding with each of my kids. My kids had other ideas... mainly ideas about adult food tasting better than milk. especially room temperature milk.  So, they all self weaned by 18 months. no big deal.. I can deal with it. I didn't force any of them into an all solid food diet before they were ready, so I felt pretty good about that. But Scoots? He's different. He's the last one, and I think he knows it somehow. He's stayed "baby" longer than any of the others.  ( if you have kids, you know what I mean about staying "baby". if you don't I wouldn't be able to explain it well enough for it to make sense) and he slid right on past that 18 month mark with ease. He still wanted to nurse at night, in the morning, and the second I got home from work. I felt Good about this. Accomplished even. I was finally going to see that 2 year mark. Yay for boobies!
Well, as usual, My self congratulation was misplaced and I'm about ready to give up on nursing all together 1 month before reaching that lofty 2 year goal. My child has turned into a "Sipper"

Let me explain. I lived through the all day nursing. I lived through the nursing and then pumping and nursing and pumping at the same time. I lived through the acrobatic nursing. I lived through the biting stage. teething. the twisty hands down the shirt stage, the trying to nurse WHILE eating or drinking so other kind of food... but the Sipping stage might just take me down.
It goes something like this. Scoots comes over and climbs up on my lap. He snuggles in and lets me know he wants to nurse. we get settled in, He latches on and then 10 seconds later he SITS UP to watch something, or listen to something, or tell something to a big brother, or play with my keyboard, or sing something, and then he latches Back on for 10 EFFING seconds!! this goes on for 10- 15 minutes until I freak the fuck out, and kick him off my lap. He cries a bit, then he goes and plays for a few minutes and then comes back to snuggle up on my lap again. we repeat this disaster 6-10 times a day. Misery.

I thought once I survived being a walking jungle gym that anything else would be a cake walk.. boy was I wrong. being a human sippy cup is the most skincrawlingly irritating thing I've ever experienced with one of my kids.

Anyone else had an older nursling do this routine with them? does it Stop?? How did YOU survive it?
Send me a msg. for real, because I'm about to go batshit crazy from this nonsense.

Why I don't mind being a bitch, and why I'm going to try blogging.

Where to start...

I recently realized that almost everyone I know has a certain opinion of me. This might bother some people, for me it was just one of those " Oh, well that explains some stuff." moments. What is this opinion? Well, its that I'm a bitch. Notice that I didnt capitalize that. Its not because I'm too lazy, or that I have a toddler climbing on me while I type ( although that IS the case). It's because I'm not a Bitch ( BIG Capital B Bitch), I'm just a little bit bitchy. Its an occupational hazard. I'm a manager, so am the bearer of bad news, or to do lists, or the " I know you don't want to do it, but its your job so you'd better do it or we're going to have to have a chat.." convo. I'm also a Mom, so I am the chore list giver, tooth brushing nazi, homework police, room cleaning enforcer, and general bad guy. I have a wide variety of interests and do a lot of reading and research on things, so I am quite opinionated and if you ask me for advice, or for my opinion, you're going to get it. And I wont sugar coat it.

I don't go out of my way to be a bitch. Its not something I have worked hard at or that I cultivate. I genuinely try to be a kind, helpful, understanding, fair person. But I am not "nice". I am not a push over. I am not a "Yes man".  This means that I have many people who respect me, many people who come to me for help, many people who want my advice, but I am not the fun person. I am not popular in a traditional sense. I am not a person with a lot of  Social friends, and I'm ok with that. But, that brings me to why I'm going to try blogging.,,

I need an outlet. I need to be able to Vent, or Cheer, or Whine, and just get things out of my head sometimes.. but since I'm the person everyone goes to when they need those things.. I cant really unload on them. Even my poor husband looks at me like I've got a screw loose when I try to talk to him about anything thats overly exciting to me, or that has me really on edge, or that I'm upset about... because my job- the thing I DO day in and day out - at work AND at home, is to keep it all together.

I'm hoping that I can use this as a tool to let loose a bit since I dont have to be the boss here. I intend to post silly things, fun things, angry things, things that are important to me, things that are just odd, things I find interesting. I will post products I love, I will post stories from my life, and yes - I will post things I need to bitch about.

Follow if you want, and if you like it you can share it...